I want to ask your opinion on something.
We have always had pets. Dogs, mice, chickens. Our family has always been surrounded by furry and feathery friends.
In the last month, we have lost three of our pets. A month ago (give or take) one pet mouse died. We knew it was coming, they don't have a very long life span. Two nights ago, another pet mouse died. Again, it was expected, but still hard for the kids. Last night, around midnight, a nocturnal predator raided our chickens and made away with one of them. Sadly, it was the chicken that belongs to the child who has the most trouble with grief.
I feel that even with the heartache of losing a pet comes great pleasure from owning pets. I feel that they bring so much life to our family, they make us feel....good. I also feel that it is healthy for children to be exposed to such hard issues because they get the experience and are somehow prepared for larger issues later.
Another family member insists that the kids shouldn't have pets, because it isn't worth the heartache that they go through when they die or get lost.
My question to you is this: What are your feelings on pets - the good, the bad. How do you handle pet death? How do you tell your kids? Do you think it's worth it? Please leave a comment. I am very interested in how others deal with this.
Thank you!
5 comments:
Good post. Well, we have pets and luckily we have yet to experience a doggie or kitty death. (I am knocking on wood now). So, I fall back on my upbringing when it comes to this one. As a child, I was always surrounded by pets and lots of them. And, I still remember some really sad events to this day, but it is a life lesson. We only have so much control when it comes to shielding our kids and in this instance, I really think pets add to the family mix. They bring so much joy and love. I definitely think there is more to gain than to lose even when death or accidents are surely to happen. I, too, was the kid in the family that had a hard time with loosing a pet, but it's natural and inevitable and with time it gets better.
i would say that if you can afford a pet, by all means have one for your kids. pets teach our children (and us!) so much. we learn to love something unconditionally because pets really only provide us pleasure (ok, and a few eggs if they're chickens!). they teach kids responsibility by caring for them. and yes, they teach about the cycle of life. children will have a much easier time dealing with the death of a loved one if they've experienced death already through a pet. of course, it's difficult. it should be! most pets are beloved members of our family.
but if a child has an unreasonable response to an animal's deathh, then there may be other issues s/he is dealing with. these may need to be addressed apart from the pet...
anni
i think anni's advice is insightful, but i agree w/ both commenters.. pets are so wonderful to have. personally, i did not deal w/ the loss of a pet til i was in college, which meant i'd lost a lifelong pet, but i was also more mature to handle it. my kids will probably experience the loss of our family dog pele sooner than i had to... she's already 6, and maybe has 6 more years to her, give or take. she is my first pet after my paretns' house so i will miss her so much and i'm sure the boys will be affected, but i am so glad to instill in them now how much we can learn to love by having a dog in our midst.
We've had a number of pets. It's hard when we lose one. We had a beloved 16 year old dog that we needed to say good bye to a few years back. But we wouldn't have traded that 16 years that she was with us for anything. Love comes with a cost. But who would choose going without love?
When I think back to my childhood and the pets that I had, I do remember the hard parts when they died, but mostly I remember the good parts.
take care.
I agree with you. We have a houseful of kids and pets (3 kids, 2 small dogs, 2 cats, one foster cat, on parakeet, and we had 2 sister mice who are now passed on from old age). We have lost 3 cats and one dog during the kid's childhood and they are now only 10, 12, and 15. They learn to deal with grief, they see how we love and also how we mourn, and it's part of life.
They also see the steps we take to card for our pets as part of our family, visit to the vet, grooming etc, and feeding/caring for them teaches responsibility. I think that if you have a home that can support pets and no one with allergies, then by all means, they are an important part of the growing up experience. My 2 cents. :)
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